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Marriage Be Hard: 12 Conversations to Keep You Laughing, Loving, and Learning with Your Partner Spiral-Bound | September 13, 2022

Kevin Fredericks, Melissa Fredericks

★★★★☆+ from 501 to 1,000 ratings

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Discover the keys to upholding your vows while staying sane in this hilariously candid guide to relationships

Growing up in the church, Kevin and Melissa Fredericks were taught endless rules around dating, sex, and marriage, but not a lot about what actually makes a relationship work. When they first got married, they felt alone—like every other couple had perfect chemistry while the two of them struggled. There were conversations that they didn’t know they needed to have, fears that affected how they related to each other, and seasons of change that put their marriage to the test. 

Part of their story reads like a fairytale: high school sweethearts, married in college, never sowed any wild oats, with two sons and a thriving marriage. But there’s another side of their story: the night Melissa kicked Kevin out of her car after years of communication problems, the time early in their marriage when Kevin bordered on an emotional affair, or the way they’ve used social media and podcasts to conduct a no-holds-barred conversation about jealousy, divorce, and being Christian and sex-positive. (Because, as Kevin writes, “Your hormones don’t care about your beliefs. Your hormones want you to subscribe to OnlyFans.”)

In Marriage Be Hard, they go beyond the rules preached on Sunday mornings and the advice given at men’s and women’s groups, providing a masterclass on what it takes to build a lasting relationship. Drawing on interviews with experts and nearly two decades of marriage, they argue that:
•  Compatibility is overrated.
•  Communication is about way more than simply talking.
•  Seeing divorce as an option can actually help your marriage.

Real marriage is not automatic. It ain’t no Tesla on the open road. Sometimes it’s a stick shift on a hill in the rain with no windshield wipers. But if you get comfortable visiting—and revisiting—the topics that matter, it can transform your bond with your partner and the life you’re building together.
Publisher: Penguin Random House
Original Binding: Hardcover
Pages: 256 pages
ISBN-10: 0593240421
Item Weight: 0.8 lbs
Dimensions: 5.7 x 1.0 x 8.6 inches
Customer Reviews: 4 out of 5 stars 501 to 1,000 ratings
“Honey, listen, I’ve been married for nineteen years, and the title of the book lets me know that Kev and Melissa are not afraid to tell the truth! They had me at chapter 1, ‘Expectations Be Hard.’ Baby, this book ain’t hard to love!”—Tabitha Brown, actress, vegan foodie, and New York Times bestselling author of Feeding the Soul

“While Kev and Melissa show us how hard marriage can be, they also show us how beautiful it can be if you’re willing to be vulnerable and really do the work. This is essential reading for anyone married or for anyone remotely considering marriage.”—Tommy and Codie Oliver, creators of Black Love, Inc.

“Marriage Be Hard is a relatable, honest take on life, love, and relationships. In their typical style, Kev and Melissa are authentic and engaging, playful and downright hilarious. They humbly offer readers real talk that both models healthy relational skills and vulnerably pulls the curtain back on some of the most common marital concerns. As a relationship counselor, I’d recommend the book to any couple wanting a fun, structured way (with awesome prompts!) to approach some deep, growth-promoting conversations.”—Morgan Johnson, MA, LPC, relationship counselor and trust recovery specialist

“As a licensed marriage and family therapist, I was particularly interested in the ‘Communication Be Hard’ chapter. I know from my work that all aspects of communication can impact relationships for better or worse. The ‘check-ins’ at the end of each chapter cause the reader to engage in reflective evaluation of their own behavior. Written with the same authenticity and honesty that Kev and Melissa operate with on their podcast, this book will undoubtedly help folks improve their relationship with their partner and themselves.”—Stevon Lewis, licensed marriage and family therapist

“Kevin and and his wife Melissa Fredericks dial up the laughs in their candid debut about the trials of marriage. . . . The authors’ humor and willingness to probe intimate details of their relationship contribute to the appeal. The result is a funny and deeply sincere look at improving one’s marriage.”—Publishers Weekly

Kevin Fredericks is an NAACP Image Award nominated comedian, the founder of KevOnStage Studios, and a superstar on social media, posting hilarious content rooted in faith, family, and over-all relatability for millions of followers every day. Melissa Fredericks is a Los Angeles-based influencer dedicated to helping women become the best versions of themselves through honesty, transparency, and vulnerability. Together she and Kevin are the creators of The Love Hour podcast, which has been downloaded millions of times to date.

Author Residence: Los Angeles, California